Cancer post

I really have not been on the computer lately and when I am it is just to check my bank account and pay bills...
well and get on Pinterest so I can dream about homesteading!
It has been so nice outside so I spend alot of my time out there listening to kids play!
Also the twins got sick and through me all off. 

For the most part I have been feeling really good, like so good that I have been scared something bad was going to happen.
I guess that is the realist pessimist in me! 
I go out and rake leaves, start fires, and make Kyle build things like chicken brooders and fence for me! I usually have one or two really productive days, then I wear myself out and dont do alot for a day or two.

Valentines week was a really hard one for me.
It is weeks like that when I realize I am not the woman I was before this last year.
I was that mom who would make cute boxes, have the girls dressed cute, hearts in their hair, and a cute treat for the class, teachers, office ladies, and neighbors,
and be able to still do things like clean the house and make dinner. 
When Grace was in kindergarten, her box was awesome. I spent days on it.
The twins got a shoe box that was cute and we put there names on it. They were really happy with them and I had keep telling myself that.
I did get caramels made and thanks to Laura and my children for making me feel like I can still do something right!

This year I was barley keeping my head above water, I felt like I was drowning, I was scared, sad, nervous, and mad. 
Since the beginning of this shitty cancer experience I have always compared it to being thrown into the ocean with sharks, maybe it is because I am deathly afraid of water and fish,
and this experience some days is terrifying.

I went to see Dr. Anne to make sure my skin looks good enough for my soft implant surgery. She said that she thinks I will be so happy with the end result.
I can not wait to have these hard expanders out and the soft ones in.
I will probably throw a soft boob party, but for real! 
I go in to surgery on March 21st, I am counting down the days!!

I really cant complain,
my hair is starting to grow, my eyelashes have fell out again, but are coming back, I feel great most days,
And I dont worry about the cancer coming back near as much as I was.
I dont know if it is cause I dont watch TV and dont get on the computer often so I can stay away from cancer stuff, or if it is cause I am taking my oils religiously, exercising, and eating healthier, or it could be time.
It is probably a little of all those things!
And, if you cant tell for the randomness of this post, I still have chemo brain, I blame it on the tamoxifen. That means that I get to use that as an excuse for the next 10 years.

catch up

The weather has been perfect here so we have been outside enjoying it as much as we can.
Since it has been so warm, we decided to start the garden. Hopefully we get lots of tomatoes this year! 

Ginger, my broody hen, got her wish to be a mom! Amanda gave me some fertilized eggs and after 20 days, 5 out of 5 leghorns hatched! They have been so fun to watch run around the backyard.  

We have also been sick here at this house. The twins had a stomach virus and it was not fun! They puked, had high fevers, and didnt get off the couch for 3 days.

Grace did not catch the bug and since she is my hardest one while sick, I am happy she didnt get it! Over the long presidents day weekend she tried to build a fort, but then gave up and just jumped on the trampoline and said that was her fort! 

There really hasnt been alot going on here at the Leavitt home, I watch chickens and listen to little girls, I couldnt be happier! 

Hiking

While Kyle was pig hunting, the girls and I went hiking with Amanda and her kids!
We packed a lunch, lots of water and set off to the hills!

It was alot of fun! The kids were dirty head to toe and even slid down a hill like a slide!
The girls looked homeless, but we were on vacation!

Mom and Steve

Mom and Steve came to visit.
The girls had big plans for them, they went over for the weekend and had so much fun!
They went bowling, ate breakfast for dinner, went on a hike, and stayed up way later than they were suppose to!

Mom and Steve would come over everyday and visit. One day while sitting outside, Addison got all the toys in the yard and then sat there shooting the water gun at us! She thought she was pretty funny!

We love when they come to visit!

I wasnt really wanting to go to marysvale for the short trip. I knew that it would kick my butt for the rest of the week, but I really wanted to see all the old people there, so I went!
I am glad that I did, I got to visit with both sets of my grandparent and my dad!
It was cold, so we just hung out inside and played.

Making cookies!

While we were in Marysvale, Grandma Helen made some cookie dough for the girls to make sugar cookies!
They had flour everywhere and were in heaven.
I couldn't bring myself to eat one cause little girls hands had been all over them, but Kyle and Grandpa ate them all!

marysvale and ice fishing

Kyle and all his brothers and dad decided to go to Fish Lake and do some ice fishing! 

There was a big contest up there catching perch, but the Leavitt men werent all that successful. 

It sounded like they had alot of fun, even if the ice was melting something terrible!!